Where's the Records?!?

Why you won't find Schopenhauers' records in your local cd shop

After our big succe$$ during the first decade of SCHOPENHAUERS-mania, we all decided to invest in our own future and in some real-good ventures:
First of all, we bought back our contract rights from the record companies "WARMER Bros.", "IME", and "R&A"...

Our attitude towards pop music culture and our philosophy of "down with the money making weirdos and top floor managing cranks of major record companies" simply did not allow selling records to the poor for big money when, at the same time, people could buy bargain crap compilation CDs in any supermarket...

Hence the SCHOPENHAUERS have bought back their contracts, and have assigned all records as they have been produced and stored in the shops so far to be instantly destroyed by any means.

Second step was to pull back all broadcasting rights for video clips and talk show entries and so on and after a couple of months of intensive acting-like-the-"Residents"-always-do, THE SCHOPENHAURS could remark a downturn of a happy 96% of their income.

Well, this was merely years ago and therefore we're deadly sure that you won't find any sign of the SCHOPENHAUERS in the media world today.

Needless to point out that our acting as the Robin Hoods of Pop (as we saw it) was meant to be called "selfish", "extremely snobby" and led to a total ban of the SCHOPENHAUERS from the media and press industries. (This might be another reason for the utter fact that many young people today have never heard of THE SCHOPENHAUERS at all - funny, eh?).

Sigh, sigh, sigh.

Anyway, should you be interested in ordering any of our records, then we can now cheerfully announce that "THE SHOP IS OPEN": Click yourself to paradise (or our order form instead) and purchase our records till you drop. -
"Drop" is a good point: You can easily order our stuff by dropping your cc information.

Yes, it's safe! - In fact, eventually "secure payment" over the Internet was invented by the Schopenhauers themselves (who else wanted to put their hands into the fire?!), and you really can trust us. Honestly. Definetely. Maybe.

Shy people and folks without a valuable cc must pay in advance and cash. Sorry, but we're in for the bucks and money-makes-the-wheel-go-round is a vitally important factor in our money-making society and without money you're a monkey, you know, and anyway: If you intend to get some audio revenue for no cash at all, then shove off (or click yourself to our sound clips page).

Lazy sods...